Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
