im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize