my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Randomize
