You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize