wat bout pragnant strippers??
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize