Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
