Hey man sorry I got all grabby
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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