Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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