did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
