2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Randomize
