i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
