In the future we'll all be gay
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
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