I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
