so explain again why im purple
no
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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