He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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