put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
