My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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