who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
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