Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
