Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
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