Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
