What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize