when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
