You made me cry and you don't even care
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
