My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
