I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize