it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
you will always have a special place in my vag
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize