I'm so fucking centered right now
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
