There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
