youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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