That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize
