could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
