If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
wow bdsm is so cute
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