Who did Billy Mays play for?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize