You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
you didnt know i had herpes?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
