anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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