I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I think I sprained my soul last night
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Randomize