bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Randomize
