Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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