I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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