Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
