can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize