So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
