The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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