Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
