yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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