plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
