You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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