You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize