I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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